The world's tallest man, Leonid Stadnyk, is 8' 5 and lives in the Ukraine in a small village with his mother. He is, according to 20/20 and other information I have read, lonely. He finds his height to be a curse. Maybe, though height is not a curse so much as having a heart within a huge body that is a curse.

The second tallest man in the world who is 7' 8, and lives in Mongolia once too suffered from loneliness too, but recently married a young woman and in pictures seems very happy standing next to his young bride.

Sometimes I too feel huge. It's a very silly feeling. My hands seem to big for my body and I tower over my girlfriends. There are times I also blame my height as reasons as why I am still single. I know how silly that sounds. I am very silly at times.

It's part of my charm.

Last night, I cried myself to sleep. This was after a 3 and half hour phone conversation (that I dubbed as 'pity party.' It was a great long distance party with two guests that they will talking about for years) where I was allowed to go on and on, jumping from one conversation topic to another but always allowed to come back around to how sad I felt. One moment I was comparing the Rockys and the Appalachians; the next I was explaining how I cocoon myself within my blankets so that I don't feel so alone in the big empty bed. I blinked back tears as often as I laughed, and thought about how funny it was that I hadn't been on the phone that long since high school. In fact, I don't really enjoy talking in the phone most of the time, but last night it seemed completely normal.

I woke up this morning feeling slightly better as there were other things that had to be taken care. Kyla is having a much harder time than I am and we had coffee with, Mara, Casey, and Joe. I spent a little longer with them than I had planned but it was nice to test Joe's knowledge on 80's goth and talk to Casey about hair and food.

Now, I have to try and get everything done I should have been doing the last five days. I'm not being too hard on myself about it. I think I needed the last five days to decompress and I did grade papers and wash half the dishes.

I have to get things together if I'm going to get out of this blue funk, but when I get home from all the places I've been I just want to sit and do nothing till it's time to drag myself back to the bed I sleep alone in and when I wake up I don't want to get back out of bed to face another day of the blue funk.