I feel near tears. I have all day. I was talking with Nick, the kids friend, who I spoke with at length about the novel The Unprofessionals a couple of days ago and we joked about he and I are very much like the main characters in that book expect our friendship is face-to-face and not phone based but similar nonetheless,about how I think I am emotional deficient at the moment (thought, I don't think that is quite the right term for how I feel). I just have given so much, and gotten so little back that I'm broken up and tried.

Maybe that's why I come off as bitter sometimes? Even when I am nice to the overworked cashiers in the market. Though, I am not always as nice to those people who live with me, but then neither are they. But, they are young and are going to have to learn some hard lessons and it's time for me to let them go and do those things.

Sid got lost today on his bike (which he is learning to enjoy quite a bit) because he was going the wrong way down a one way and was pulled over by the police, and after they made him cry (because he has a deep fear of the police for lots of valid and non-valid reasons), he went over to the next block to ride the right way and become confused, but he found his way home and is not at a rave hopefully having some fun and dancing. 

I made dinner for my friend April tonight so we could hash out my teaching demo, but then I invited Emily to come over too and so we mainly just talked a lot and caught up and drank a lot of white wine together. It was nice, but now I just feel so alone and sad. I am not always the best company for myself. 

But, I try and there's that.